The Latest Cheesy K12 Pirates' Lair Newsletter

News From The Two-Wheeled No-Spin Zone...!!

Pirates' Lair Robbed !! : "Infidel Defilers. They shall all drown in lakes of blood. "

A few weeks ago while returning from the Texas Hill Country K12 Rally, I stopped in at Touring Sport BMW in Greenville, SC to have a software upgrade done on my K1200S. I parked my truck in front of the store, rolled the bike off our custom trailer, then waited inside the store for about an hour while they did the upgrade. When I went out to load the bike back on to the trailer I discovered our Ford Explorer, the Pirates Lair motorcycle trailer, and about $4000 worth of riding gear (inside the Explorer) was gone! Taken by some sorry thieving bastage. This was a major financial hit to Amber and myself. After Satan...er.. I mean the insurance company paid off last week we were still out a lofty $14,000.. Ouch..

Initially, I had intended to use this most holy of forums to flame the insurance company for bending us over and giving it to us hard and dry, but... I won't. I had planned on flaming the Greenville police dept for not being able to spot a 10ft motorcycle trailer at rush hour with 8 ft skull and crossbones graphics all over it.... but.. I won't. I had also planned on flaming the useless "bags of mostly water" that stole from us... but I won't. I've spent the last few weeks trying to "purge" the anger and move on, which I would assume is the mentally healthy thing to do. . After all... It could have been worse.. They didn't get my bike and everything else was just replaceable "stuff." I am of the belief that what comes around goes around. He/she/they will face retribution if not in this life... in the next.. Hopefully something fitting involving lots of pain, blood, lit cigarettes, and smashed testicles.. but I digress.

I would like to thank the good people at Touring Sport BMW of Greenville for their help and support since the theft. They ended up replacing 80% of the stolen gear at dealer cost without me having to ask them. Good people. I'd also like to thank Sir Chris Heilman at www.hotglassheilman.com for auctioning off one of his pieces d' art and then contributing (against our will) the proceeds in the form of a multi-hundred dollar gift certificate from AeroStitch Rider Warehouse.

As for the bastages who ripped Amber and I .. Your payback will come..You had better pray to your respective god that its not at the edge of my rusty blade..

"Crom, I have never prayed to you before. I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That's what's important! Valor pleases you, Crom... so grant me one request. Grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you! "

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Shaka.. When the Walls Fell: Nationwide BMW Recall!

It's official.. There is a nationwide recall on certain new BMW's due to a problem with the can-bus / servo assisted ABS system. Apparently under extreme conditions .. rapid and/or frequent use of the brakes.. the ABS may stop functioning or some such shite. Models affected... 2005-2006 K1200S and R's, 2005-2006 R1200GS, and 2006 R1200RT... but don't take my word for it.. you can find the pdf notice from the Dept of Transportation at http://199.79.180.162/prepos/files/Artemis/Public/Recalls/2006/V/RCAK-06V164-2115.pdf

The recall has already begun. If you are one of the lucky ones... you can either call your quasi-respected extortionist...er.. dealer for details, BMWNA at 800-831-1117, or the NHTSA hotline at 888.327-4236 or just wait and you'll receive a notice in the mail.
Bottom line.. the problem is rare and minor... the fix is simple. Some may get new rotors!! Woohoo!.. No big deal. That's what warranties are for... While you're in ask for the software upgrade which is also free..and a free hat for your trouble. .. Dare them to refuse.

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Follow Up!! Larry Grodsky vs Destiny

In last months newsletter I mentioned the death of Larry Grodsky ...founder of Stayin' Safe Motorcycle Tours freelance author of safe riding articles for Rider, and world renowned teacher of on-road rider education classes. He was killed in Texas while riding back home at night on a bike purchased in California. Hit a freakin' deer. Many have asked the circumstances as Larry was one of the best riders out there... Here's the rest of the story contributed by our good pal, Ken Bowen who visited the crash site.

" As reported by the AP, Larry was traveling north on US 385, between Marathon and Ft. Stockton, TX, on Saturday, April 8th. He was about 30 miles from either of these two towns, or literally in the middle of no where. Supposedly his intentions were to spend the night in Ft. Stockton. The report states that the incident occurred around 8 PM. This would have been just at dusk. Not yet dark, but almost. Just the time when the deer become active for the evening.

We rode south from Ft. Stockton, five days after LG's deer encounter, and riding opposite of Larry's direction of travel, the area was quite desolate…not exactly where you find deer. As we approached the roadside park from the north, the area became more dense with a growth of scrub brush. This was looking more like deer country now.

About a mile south of the roadside park, we found the crash scene. The road was marked by the TX DPS investigators, as well as skid marks from where the bike slid o the tarmac after the fall. Our measurements indicated the bike skidded about 280 feet from the point of impact (marked with an "X") until it came to rest (marked with oil and a bike outline). There was no indication of actual tire skid marks.

The carcass of the dead deer was also still at the scene, off the roadway by the fence. It was a very young deer, what was left of it. It was not the mule deer we had previously thought, which is more common (and much larger) in this part of Texas. With just the right type of impact and speed, it's possible to survive a collision with an animal of this size. (I am of the opinion that more speed is better than low or decreasing speed.)

The point of impact was about two feet to the right of the center line, which was marked by the DPS investigators. It appeared that he was riding in the proper lane position, especially for riding where the possibility of encounters with animals increases. He probably never moved...again pure speculation.

Most of us are just average riders when it comes to safety. Some of you are maybe above average. Larry, well he was the expert. For such an incident to happen to someone like Larry just scares me to death, being one of those average motorcycle riders.

We have to create something positive from this tragic loss. LG's death should sound the warning bell to all of us regarding wildlife encounters and the dangers they present. It certainly increased our awareness for the entire trip. The trick is to perpetuate that awareness and concern so as to carry over into future rides…
Ken Bowen

From Amber and myself.... Our heartfelt condolences to Larry's girlfriend and the Grodsky family.. Vaya con Dios, my friend..